CASUAL

When we woke I felt there was a manhole cover on my head, my eyes were inside out and my throat swabbed with wire wool soaked in paraffin.  Stark naked and painted pillar box red, 'Let's go,' I said, prodding James. The  church congregation was aghast. 'Act casual', I advised.

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PARTNER

via Daily Prompt: Partner My significant other was in the toilet. I waited, drinks in hand. I hated works dos even if they had a social function.  'Go by yourself,' I encouraged. She wouldn't. A co-worker approached, gel slick and leery. 'Hello,' he drooled, 'all alone?.' 'No, waiting on my partner.'